Me – Really?…

Ella – Yeah.  Mrs. Kane says ‘Keep your clothes on so no one can see your bottom.’  That means we go to a PRIVATE school.

My name is Kristi, and I:

• Love lists
• Am 36
• 5’8”
• Mommy to two girls – Maggie (6) and Ella (4).
• Never felt a contraction in childbirth. Turns out I have a high pain tolerance, an even greater fear of pain, and a quick draw on the epidural. “Hook me up!”
• Married to my best friend
• Born in the south. Grew up with a thick southern accent, y’all.
• Was once bitten by a squirrel (I was trying to save its life from a neighbor’s cat)
• Am just as much introvert as extrovert.
• Would probably never be the life of the party unless that’s what it took to make everyone feel comfortable at my party.
• Enjoy a good fine tip pen and cannot read without a pencil in my hand
• Love Diet Mountain Dew and sour gummy worms
• Enjoy reading whenever and wherever I can. I once fell off the treadmill while reading an especially good book
• Sometimes hire a babysitter so that I can go the library to read and make lists.
• Am in pursuit of knowing and loving the God who I’m learning already completely knows and loves me.

What about you?….

It’s almost that time of year again.  Time to visit Grumpy Santa.  Here’s my old Xanga post about him.  I’m already wondering if he’ll be there again this year….

Nov. 24, 2006

So we went to the Christmas Tree Farm today.  We go every year to the same farm about an hour or so West of here.  Great place — we always have a wonderful time!  And the weather was unusually warm today.  It was beautiful actually!  Near 60 degrees, I think.  It was a bit odd because every year, the day after Thanksgiving, we go… and it is usually freezing.  So cold that we bundle the kids with so many layers and coats that they are unable to bend any part of their bodies.  And forget about using the outdoor portable toilets in that kind of freezing weather — except that you can’t really forget using them because we’re always there too long to wait til we get back home…

Well, anyway… I digress.  :/  TODAY was lovely!  But as I was looking through our pictures this evening, I noticed something.  Is it just me, or does this Santa look a little cranky? 

Just a bad picture you wonder?  But here he is again?…  Looks like he’s thinking, “Hhmm… I knew I shouldn’t have had that 3rd cup of coffee, those port-a-johns are COLD!”

Me:  “Really, why?”

M:  “I’m afraid the battery’s going to die, and it will start beeping really loud.”

I understood exactly what she meant.  It IS loud, and I’m pretty sure they actually wait until we’re all in Stage 4 sleep to start beeping their complaints about battery life.

So I responded, “It’s okay, Hon… I changed your battery not long ago.”

M  (having obviously processed this fully):  Well, actually there are THREE things I’m afraid of.

Me:  Really?  Three?

M:  Yeah.  One. That the battery will die.  Two.  That there will be a fire.  And three, that there will be a fire, and I’ll have to run outside in my underwear.

Is this my kid or is this my kid?  Bizarrely contemplative and already making lists.  I love it!

The other day, my 3 year old Ella was talking about her Daddy and said his name, “Ray.”  Then she decided to try and spell it.

E:  R-A-I-J

This triggered another thought…

E: Mom, there’s a boy in my class named PJ.

Me:  PJ or AJ? (knowing that the boy’s name really is AJ.)

E: AJ

Me:  Is AJ a boy or a girl?

E: She’s a boy.

Me:  He’s a boy?

E:  Yeah, hers not a girl like me….

Older people have similar Pronoun Ambiguity.  Both of my girls were born bald and stayed that way for a couple of years.  I did my best to dress them in girly colors and put tiny hair clips in their hair fuzz to help others know they were, in fact, GIRLS.  Yet older people still often came to me, saying things like

“Oh HE’S so cute…” or

“What a cute little boy!” or

“How old is he?”

I’d smile graciously.  “HER name is Maggie.  SHE’S 4 months old.”

To which they’d reply something like, “Oh… HE looks just darling in that pink dress.”

So apparently this Pronoun Confusion has something to do with being very young.  Or with being very old.  When you’re somewhere in the middle, like me, you have other struggles — like mixing up your own children’s names, for instance…

Despite my best intentions, we still ended up rushing to find and put on everyone’s shoes on our way out the door Wednesday morning. 

When we arrived, we were greeted in the hallway by teary-eyed teachers telling us that the school had been cancelled for the day. 

<sniff, sniff>

Final renovations for the opening of the new Bedrock children’s program on the floor above the preschool had left some very strong paint odors in the building. 

Soo… we headed back home.  Ready to count down one more day. 

The next morning (Thursday), we weren’t disappointed!  Ella finally got to walk through the door of her class, and begin her first day of preschool.

She was so excited that she could feel her heart “beeping”!

(Click here to see the original “Fairly Typical Day in My Life.”)

And like when she woke up yesterday morning and told me that she had a “pig in her throat.”  I’m not sure, but I’m guessing that’s a cross between having “a frog in your throat” and being “hoarse.”

Here’s a funny conversation we had on the way to school  yesterday….

Ella:  Mommy, look a squirrel!

Mommy:  Oh, I missed it, Ella.

E:  He was sleeping on the side of the road.

Maggie:  He probably wasn’t sleeping.  Sometimes squirrels just sit very still with their heads up like this (perches forward in her booster) while they’re looking for nuts.

E:  This one had it’s head down.  Like this (leans forward, face down)  He was sleeping in the sun…

An outfit?  Hhm… why hadn’t I thought about that yet.  Tomorrow morning I will capture a picture of this momentous day that could very likely be used in her wedding video in 20 years. 

So off to Target we went. 

As we wheeled through the aisles, Ella was singing, “I’M GOING TO SCHOOL TOMORROW!  I’M GOING TO SCHOOL TOMORROW.”  While Maggie was repeating over and over, and just as loudly, “THIS IS ANNOYING!  THIS IS ANNOYING!…”

This serenade plus a sticky Icee incident on the hair accessory aisle and an emergency mid-shopping-trip run to the restroom rounded off our time at Target.

It was really quite entertaining actually.  Thanks again for bringing up the whole outfit thing, Jill.    I think we’re all set now…